Of a Piece or All to Pieces

Tonight, I sat rocking our little baby back to sleep.  I was thinking about how different her and our older daughter are.

Rosalyn sucked her thumb.  No matter how many times I’ve tried, I cannot get Eliana to suck hers– she likes her binky.

Rosalyn decided cold turkey at 4 months she didn’t want to be swaddled or rocked to sleep anymore… much to momma’s dismay.  Eliana likes to transition slowly into change.

Rosalyn never spit up. I had soooo many spit rags that I never used.  Now, I always have one within reach because Eliana spits up ALL the time.

Rosalyn was very outgoing and a performer from infancy.  Eliana seems to prefer her momma and people she’s familiar with.

Rosalyn was always pretty easy going and calm.  Eliana likes to be on the move… and she moves a lot!  On the other hand, Rosalyn moved all around while sleeping– she rolled around whole bed.  But Eliana stays in one position, moving only her head, even when she’s not swaddled.

I often say that Rosalyn was such an easy baby.  And she was.  But it implies that Eliana is a difficult baby.  Which isn’t necessarily untrue… but what it really comes down to is that I’ve had to grow more this time around than I had to grow with Rosalyn. Sure, I grew in all the normal ways you’re forced to when becoming a parent for the first time.  But this time around, I’ve been challenged on whole new playing fields.  I’ve had to level-up not only my own parenting skills but my own personal life.  I’ve learned so much more this time around.

They say that each child is different and you can’t parent the same.  I knew that coming in.  And yet, I still approached caring for Eliana and parenting her with the same skills and tactics that worked for Rosalyn.  Even though I knew that it would be different.

I think it’s normal to approach things with what skills and knowledge you already have about you.  We approach life according to our own understanding of how to do things.  We approach situations, people, circumstances with our own comprehension.

Some cases it works well.  But in other cases, it can leave us completely frustrated and unsuccessful.

Scripture tells us to lean not on our own understanding. Don’t lean on what you’ve already learned, what you’ve already accomplished, what skills you’ve already acquired.  Yes, those things are useful, but they may or may not work.  But don’t approach life and circumstances solely from that angle.  Because that’s when we’ve stopped learning… it’s putting a cork on learning from the Lord.

Instead, approach the Lord.  It may be that He’s already given you the skill you need through some other circumstance.  Or it may be that He wants to give you a new tool or change how you use a tool you already have to better fit what you’re going through now.

It’s growing and walking together WITH Him.  It’s learning from Him and walking in His power.

For me, it’s learning to grow with my child.  It’s learning how to be a better mom because of the grace of the Lord.

It’s learning to walk together– with Him.  With my husband.  With my kids.  With believers.  With unbelievers.  And if I get the first one right, all the rest flow through.  If I walk by myself, according to my own might… well, things might just go to pieces.



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